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I’ve been following a prayer calendar for January that I got from my aunt. It has prompts for each day to direct your prayer; things like “Ask God to speak to you and show you how to listen” and “Ask God to help you grow.”
Today’s prompt was “No words today; just sit in silence and think about God.”
As I did that, for a whole 2 minutes, I realized how little silence there’s been in my life and in my head lately.
I have a noisy, busy brain by default, but things have just been nuts lately and I needed those 2 minutes of silence like a desert hiker desperately needs water.
It’s been 6 weeks since I last posted a pregnancy update, so it’s time for another.
We are now in the third trimester of pregnancy, which is just crazy.
In a way, I feel like I’ve been pregnant forever. But at the same time, it’s like “31 weeks already?! Weren’t we just at 20, having our gender ultrasound?!”
We have 9 weeks left, and I know that is going to go fast. And that’s if I do indeed make it the full 40 weeks. I will most likely go over as most first time moms do. But the possibility of going early makes things even more real and feel more urgent.
The holidays have come and gone, bringing with them the whirlwind of family time, presents, food, treats and memories.
We had great Christmas celebrations with both families, and the realization that next year there’ll be a baby celebrating with us was fun. My sister is expecting her second this summer so next year, there’ll be THREE kids and a hyper toy poodle instead of just one kid and a dog. Get ready for more happy chaos!
Glucose Screening Test
I had my glucose screening test a few days before Christmas.
I was a little anxious about it because I’d heard horror stories from people making it seem like it was going to be terrible.
Last January, I had a colonoscopy and endoscopy though, as well as an abdominal CT scan so I figured the preparations for those that I had to drink must be worse than the sugar drink for this glucose test.
But I was still nervous.
It really did taste like slightly flat Orange Crush pop, and for someone who drinks a pop a day and has an appreciation of sugar, it was not hard for me to drink at all. Maybe if you never drink or eat sugary things, it might be tough to drink.
I was like, “All that worry for this?”
Thankfully, my numbers were good and I didn’t have to do the more advanced screening. I guess with my daily pop, my body must be pretty efficient at processing sugar.
Symptoms and a Recheck Ultrasound
I have started to have a little mild swelling in my ankles, especially after standing or sitting for a long time.
My fingers are also starting to get a little puffier, so my wedding ring is officially off and safe at home for the time being. That actual made me really sad to have to take it off. Knowing it’ll be months before I can wear it again is depressing. I wanted to take it off while it still came off easily though, rather than waiting until it was an emergency.
I went into the clinic to be checked out a few weeks back because I had some discomfort that I wasn’t sure was normal. Being a first time mom, I know nothing so I figured I might as well have some peace of mind before the approaching weekend.
Everything turned out fine, and I ended up having the recheck ultrasound my doctor wanted before my next appointment to double check placement and measurements of the placenta after the 20 week ultrasound. [Can I talk about placentas on my blog?]
Everything looked good there too, and the ultrasound showed that baby [who’s still most definitely a boy] was breech at the time of the scan. The discomfort I was feeling was most likely due to him deciding to do leg presses, squats and play soccer with my bladder and pelvis. It was so strange to watch him kicking and pressing on the ultrasound, and feel the achy feeling at the same time!
I was blessed with two amazing baby showers earlier this month.
The first was hosted by my mom and Matt’s mom, and held at my parent’s house. There was a great turnout with family and friends from all aspects of my life there.
It’s strange to be the center of attention like that and have everyone watching as you open gifts. Flash back to wedding showers!
Baby boy, Matt and I were truly showered with so much generosity from everyone.
I had a second shower the following weekend in the Cities, hosted at my aunt’s house. That one was mostly out of town family and one of my mom’s childhood friends.
Life is busy for everyone, so it was special to see people that I see at best once a year, but more likely every couple of years. I’m so thankful for everyone who came and for all of the gifts they gave to us.
I’ve spent time washing, organizing and putting away the gifts as well as some used clothes we bought from my cousin in the days since the showers. I guess that’s what they mean by the “nesting” urge. As long as the right mood hits me, I love that kind of thing. Getting things sorted and in their place.
The nursery is taking shape and starting to seem more comfy and peaceful. Well stocked, and baby-ready.
Our Target and Amazon registries both offer 15% off in the weeks before my due date, so we’re waiting for those sales to begin and then we’ll buy the rest of the things we need from the registry. Once that’s all washed and put away, that’s all we really need to do at home to prepare for baby’s arrival!
The Name Discussion Continues
Matt and I get asked all the time if we have named him yet.
We are still knee-deep in the name discussions.
We might be narrowing it down though, as we have had a current favorite for a week or two which is a first. In the past, any names I thought I liked would not seem right in a day or two.
I am not sure if we’ll decide on one before he’s here, or go into labor with a favorite and see if it fits him before really choosing.
To be honest, deciding on a name is hugely stressful to me so I’m really praying that God directs us to the right name, and helps us feel peace about the right name. I’m sure I’m over-thinking it, but it is just so permanent and an integral part of our boy’s life and future.
So until we feel that peace that we have the name for sure, I’m continuing to pray and let the current favorite float around in my head.
Labor and Birth Class
I have started feeling some anxiety about labor and delivery as it gets closer.
It’s still a long way away [or at least, I pray it is] so I’m doing my best to set the worry aside for now. There’ll be plenty of time to start worrying in the immediate weeks before I’m due. That tactic is working ok for now.
We have birth class this weekend, which I have mixed feelings about. I’m excited for it and grateful that we have access to this type of education free of charge. But I also know it will likely be very overwhelming and I’ll probably feel anxiety when I go home afterwards. I’m giving myself permission to feel overwhelmed by all of the information though, and I have already started praying for peace and surrender in the whole labor and birth process.
I know that all of these feelings are normal, and that God will help carry me through.
Someone asked me the other week if I’ve liked being pregnant.
That question made me pause as I considered how to answer the question honestly.
Some people LOVE being pregnant. They say they would be pregnant forever if they could and they wholeheartedly mean it.
I am not one of those people.
I have had a lot of lingering discomforts like nausea and other things that have been tough to deal with at times. I don’t feel incredible and like I’m radiating this maternal glow.
But I fully realize the blessing of being able to be pregnant and get to experience what is truly a miracle. And I am really trying to soak up what a privilege this whole experience is.
I feel baby boy move like crazy, all day long it seems. Yesterday, I was at the chapel and he was having a dance party in there, I swear.
I just sat there and watched my belly move, wiggle and shake. I pushed against what I’m guessing were knees and elbows, and felt him resist and then move out of the way.
How miraculous is it that what started out as just a little speck with a beating heart [that I saw on the 8 week ultrasound] is now several pounds and big enough to cause my belly to look like I swallowed a pumpkin and to move with so much force that the movements are clearly visible from a few feet away.
Pregnancy happens so frequently around us and for some, so readily and unwanted even, that we have become desensitized to the magic of it.
Yesterday was one of those days where I really realized what a true miracle it is, and the fact that yes, there is a BABY in there, and one that will soon be in our arms and growing up in front of our eyes. Lord willing.
So anyway, while I don’t necessarily LOVE being pregnant, I am very thankful for this experience and appreciative of the opportunity to go through it.
One of my past brides was pregnant with her first, and was 2 weeks ahead of me. I found out at my first shower this month that she delivered her baby at 30.5 weeks [a boy, yay!] and has been in the NICU in St. Cloud with him since. He’s thankfully doing well and is getting bigger and stronger daily, and learning how to breathe with the profound help of modern medicine.
I finally got the chance to chat with my past bride the other day and one of the things she told me was that she feels like pregnancy got ripped away from her. And it’s true, it did. She didn’t think she’d have her baby at 30.5 weeks. But situations required him to be born, and she couldn’t control that. She told me to cherish the rest of my pregnancy and to take as many photos as I could, because once he’s out, there will be a part of me that misses carrying him inside me. A part of me that misses being pregnant.
As much as I sometimes think I can’t wait to wear my old clothes again and be able to sleep on my stomach or lay flat on my back, I know that there will be things that I do miss about being pregnant, so I’m trying to cherish these last weeks in the best way I know how.
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My nesting urge has overflowed this week into finishing up some sewing projects I wanted to make, and trying to use up some of my fabric stash that has accumulated over the years.
I’m heading back down to my craft room after lunch today to make some more progress on my projects.
Some fabric, the hum of my sewing machine, and the Disney station on Pandora makes for a happy, pregnant Laura.
Thank you for your prayers as this pregnancy continues and we get closer to meeting our baby boy!