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As I type this update, I’m currently 16 weeks and 2 days pregnant.

I switch weeks on Wednesdays, so this week on Wednesday, I turned 16 weeks.

I still find myself wanting to laugh when I say or type things like that because it’s still very surreal to me that yes, I AM PREGNANT. It’s not someone else’s story this time, it’s MINE.

It’s maybe a little like prepping for a vacation for a decade and then when you’re finally on that trip, standing in the place you’ve thought and wondered about for so long, it’s hard to mentally grasp that you’re actually THERE.

“Is it sinking in yet?”

My mom asked me this the other day, and I said, “Sort of.”

I’ve had three doctor’s appointments and 2 ultrasounds now. On the most recent appointment, they used the Doppler machine so I could hear the heartbeat.

So I KNOW there’s a baby growing in there.

But on a day to day basis, I mostly feel like I ate a really big supper [or ten big suppers].

I’m looking like I’m pregnant now. The bump is growing.

My bump looks much larger when I look at it from above. Also, my chiropractor told me I should be walking every day. Knowing my general dislike for exercise, it’s hard for me to stick to any type of exercise plan. But as he pointed out, this isn’t for me. It’s for the baby! [Guilt trip!]

My regular pants can’t button, and let’s be honest, they’re getting a little snug all over.

I was cleaning my closet out the other day [konmari-ing my closet; maybe I should blog about that], and I found 2 pairs of pants I thought I’d gotten rid of because they used to be way too big.

Thankfully, I saved them for some reason. Even though they’re not actual maternity pants, they fit perfectly right now!

20 Week Appointment Coming Up

The next doctor’s appointment we have is the first week of November.

That’s the big 20 week anatomy scan ultrasound where they check over everything and where we’ll hopefully be able to find out baby’s gender.

I feel a decent amount of anxiety about the anatomy scan. Wondering and worrying if everything is ok. Nervous that they’ll find something concerning.

I think it’s normal to fear the unknown and to worry about it a little bit.

My therapist talks to me a lot about defining what’s normal versus when my anxiety goes past normal and into the extreme category. Normal anxiety is fine and expected. It’s the extreme stuff that causes issues.

So I’m praying a lot about the scan and trusting that God knows everything about this baby already.

And as my wise friend Mary told me, usually, things are just fine.

Hormones, Headaches and Zzzzzzz

Most people experience relief from their nausea and morning sickness around 12-14 weeks.

I hoped I’d be the same, but I still am not back to a normal appetite yet.

I’ve got stomach issues to begin with that might be flaring because of hormones and pregnancy in general, so it’s hard to know where morning sickness ends and my regular stomach stuff begins.

Overall though, I’ve been eating fine and as of this last appointment, I’ve been putting on the recommended weight.

I’ve reached the point now where I weigh more than I have in my life. Let’s be honest, that gave me a little bit of a “What?!?!” reaction when I first saw the scale. But those shocked thoughts passed quickly because I know I’m growing a life.

I’ve been having a ton of headaches lately which is tough because any type of reading or computer work makes them way worse.

My doctor assures me headaches at this second trimester stage are common and most likely a result of spiking progesterone. She hopes I’ll find some relief around 20 weeks from those.

I haven’t been able to wake up earlier than 8 am for a few weeks and I’m definitely experiencing the pregnancy tiredness people talk about. I didn’t have too much of it early on; so I guess I’m catching up.

I can tell my hormones are starting to swing too.

I try to be as level and even-keel as I can, but sometimes, I just wanna bawl.

The Dreaded Beeping Noise

At the end of last weekend, I started hearing this faint rhythmic beeping in my house. I tried to locate the source of the noise and couldn’t. I tried to have Matt see where it was coming from and he couldn’t find it either.

5 days passed and I still couldn’t find the source. The beeping kept right on going, day and night.

Some people can ignore noise easily, but I’m not one of those people.

On Monday night, I had a terrible headache. I couldn’t read, look at my phone or work on the computer. I couldn’t even watch TV really, because it was hurting so much.

Matt was gone so I was laying on the couch with an ice pack on my head and my eyes closed, in what was supposed to be a quiet house.

ALL I COULD HEAR WAS THAT BEEPING NOISE!!!!

I could tell my hormones were going crazy too because I almost lost it and started to bawl my eyes out. I was so frustrated with the headache and the noise, and I could not tell where it was coming from!

I started to pray that God would help us find the noise so that I wouldn’t lose my mind.

Shortly after that, I looked at the ceiling of the front entryway, where the noise seemed to be maybe the loudest. There was a smoke alarm up there.

I’ve had many smoke alarm batteries go bad in my day, but those beeps or “chirps” are usually way louder than what I was hearing.

When Matt got home that night, I asked him to get a chair and take the battery out of that smoke alarm.

The beeping stopped!

Thank the Lord, that was the cause.

I have no idea why the low battery beeping was so quiet, but I’m just beside myself with gratitude to have the beeping stopped.

*See, hormones do funny things to you!

Waiting to feel baby move

The baby books and apps tell me that I could start feeling baby move any day now.

I know there are a bunch of factors that influence when people feel movement, and first time moms sometimes have a hard time telling if it’s actual movement or gas.

My doctor said any time between now and 20+ weeks, I should start feeling baby move.

Sometimes I wonder if I’ve felt something, but let’s be honest, it’s probably just gas.

I think once I start feeling consistent movement, that will make it seem more real too.

Mindfulness and Fall

We’re right smack in the middle of peak fall leaf color right now.

When I look at the calendar and see October 9th, I do a little double take.

I know I say this every fall, and I’ll probably say it for the rest of my life, but summer seemed to slip through my fingers, and fall is following suit.

The leaves are gorgeous and we’re apparently in for a 70-80 degree weekend! One last dose of heat before the chill settles in for good.

I feel myself caught in the struggle between being busy trying to juggle lots of things [work, home, pregnancy], and trying to be mindful and present so I can enjoy not only the fall but this stage of my pregnancy.

I’ve been trying to do small, little things  to help like sitting in silence for a few minutes, closing my eyes and taking a few deep breaths.

That’s part of the reason the beeping noise was so annoying to me the other day. I was trying to make the most of the quiet time and rest my mind and body. But the beeping was getting in the way.

The other day, Matt bought our lawn mower to my parents house to troubleshoot it with my dad’s help.

The sun was shining so I laid down on my back, in the grass, and looked up at the leaves that were changing in my parent’s yard.

I think I’ll call these little pauses Mindful Fives; taking 5 minutes to just sit, breathe, notice what’s around me, and be present.

It seems insignificant, but it makes a big difference.

This weekend, my sister, brother in law and niece are coming up to visit!

Leighton seems to age by the minute based on the photos Erica texts me, and it’s been almost two months since I’ve seen them! I can’t wait to spend some quality family time together.

Other than that, Matt and I plan to take a drive around the area to look at leaves with Remy, and my sister and I hope to go check out the baby stuff at Target, so she can tell me all the “Must Haves” for our baby registry.

Thank you Lord, for these days. They are good ones.

Happy Friday!!